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So many times, it happens too fast...you trade your passion for glory. Don't lose your grip on the dreams of the past, you must fight just to keep them alive.

38, Male

Software Engineer

Somewhere in Nevada...

Somewhere in California..

Joined on 11/29/05

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Method + Tumblr

Posted by BoMToons - 10 days ago


{{ Welcome Tumblr refugees! }}

I'm still alive, though a bit bruised and broken. Trying to claw my way back to a good place. Wishing I could make everyone happy. Still hoping for the best. Definitely not angry, though I've caused plenty of that it appears.

I took a loooong break from social media, and still haven't really gone back. It was taking a toll on me and it's felt restorative to get some "negative space" (a song where I'm not the singer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gMMIT-d6WI8) going on that front. Someone told me I never follow through on my talk about quitting social media, so I stepped up to the challenge. ;-)

My new job and commute are putting a HUGE damper on my gamedev exploits, but me and @luis did eek out some time over Thanksgiving to pick back up our current project. It's a ton of fun so far, and we spec'd out some cool additions that I think people are gonna love... that is if I can find more time to work on it... hopefully over Christmas.

I decided to go totally METHOD on this game ;-P :

I'm reading (and listening to) a bunch of REALLY good books right now, I'll probably make a looong post about them when I'm done:

- Red Mars, Green Mars, Blue Mars by Kim Stanley Robinson (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mars_trilogy)

- Godel, Escher, Bach - By Douglas Hofstadter (https://www.amazon.com/G%C3%B6del-Escher-Bach-Eternal-Golden/dp/0465026567)

- Le Ton Beau De Marot - Also By Hofstadter (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Le_Ton_beau_de_Marot)

- Saints (https://history.lds.org/saints?lang=eng) [ just finished this actually ]

- Design Patterns: Elements of Reusable Object-Oriented Software (https://www.amazon.com/Design-Patterns-Elements-Reusable-Object-Oriented/dp/0201633612)

- And still chewing on Anti-Fragile (https://www.amazon.com/Antifragile-Things-That-Disorder-Incerto/dp/0812979680)

I wish I could curl up and read for the rest of my life. I also dipped my toe in writing a novel during November... didn't get a lot done, but I'm proud of what I did churn out... still lots of gaps to fill in, but it was a soul-stretching exercise. Maybe when it's done I'll share it here.

I'd also like to make a post sometime about what I'm learning at my job about the javascript framework Angular. It is actually REALLY cool and I think captures some of the magic of old-fashioned "no load" Flash sites while still being 100% HTML5 and mobile compliant. (https://angular.io/docs) 

I discovered a bunch of symmetry tools on my i-Pad and have been toying around with art in that vein. The symmetry stuff tends to make things that feel very t-shirty. I'm too lazy lately to use reference, so it's all kinda stream-of-consciousness stuff.

My mouth is watering over the new i-Pad with the magenetic snapping Apple Pencil and auto-recharging... I'm experimenting with a newish art-style and I really loved the Venom movie (movie was cheesy-horrible fun, but the character is SO intriguing!)

I've been drawing a lot of amorphous forms (Organic pencilwork) lately and I hope my brain isn't subliminally sending me the message that I have cancer...

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I should really post these (and my Inktober stuff) on the Newgrounds art portal... especially now that the "Tumblr Exodus" has begun and there will be a lot more artists on here...

Finally, @matt-likes-swords finished his next Epic Battle Fantasy installment for Steam and my character Super Chibi Knight makes the CUTEST cameo. Best of luck to him on the launch of his latest project!

Leave me a comment! Something about my books or art or games look interesting to you? Comment!

I'd love to hear from you.

--Nick


8

Comments (14)

That's cool you're learning angular. It's been one of those I'll read something useful while I'm on downtime things but there hasn't been much downtime.
This year has been kind of hit or miss. Probably most years are like that but it's good to reflect on wins and losses. It's ending on a bit of a bummer. My boss got laid off last week and some people have shitty bosses but I really appreciated her leadership and that it sucks being laid off close to Christmas or what have you. Learning what new stuff I have to do to pinch hit while waiting on a new creative director kind of sucks so today was rough cause I won't deny I woke up bitter. Did work a little on cctb during lunch to get my mind off stuff which did help not sure how unbusy I'll be in the current climate but we'll see.
On the positive side, I feel like creatively and professionally I'm at the top of my game. I might do something 'crazy' soon. Thanks for the update!

Sorry to hear about your boss, that sucks when good people get let go. Maybe you can take over her job! ;-P

We'll get CCTB done, no pressure.

Angular is pretty impressive, but I'll leave the details for a future post.

That art is really awesome! Please do post some of it. I hope you're not under too much stress with everything.

I will eventually, just gotta open up some time to go through the process.

Hey, man, stay awesome!
Unbent unbound unbroken!

Doing my best!

Bruised and broken... no bad news I hope? All good with family and work and such things...? Do you FEEL like you might have cancer...? :O Ominous messages there..

But as for the art that's looking awesome as always! From best to still-good-but-not-as-great-as-the-first-ones. And really cool news about the Epic cameo too! :D Life's not all strange poses and closed fists huh, some roses is the mix with these enclosed hits? Always fun to catch up with these posts, though kinda darker tone to this one...

I don't have any good reasons to complain, self-inflicted woes mainly... I'm ok and know things will be ok in the long run. Sorry for the dark tone, but you gotta have some bitter to appreciate the sweet in life they tell me.

Hmm, like chocolate huh, all the good kinds have a little bit of that sweet bitterness to them... so long as you're appreciating the sweets too it's all good. ;) Good to know. If it's winter woes you know D-Vitamin can really chase those away. Powerful boost on dark UV-ray lacking days.

Hm, I hadn't considered the Seasonal Affective Disorder "Winter Blues" slant. I do usually get down a bit at this time of year... thanks for the reminder! I'm in warm and sunny California now though, so I can't complain much.

Honetly , i feel welcome. tubmlr was fun but thanks to sjws , we lost but its great we have a new home

Such controversy!

@BoMToons , honestly tumblr is full of it. And drama too

I hope the influx of people to NG will turn out good for everyone. NG is a special place with a lot of talented and caring people. I hope we see it return to its full splendor as an Internet top dawg.

Ah, man, envy! XD Though you did have that gigantic fire right? Anything you've been affected by personally?

The smoke got really bad down here, I know a couple people who lost homes, but nothing directly affecting me.

Must be pretty horrible to lose your home... we live in such naive safety over here, feeling like all these natural (well maybe not so natural but:) disasters hitting others won't be affecting us, but you never know until things come knocking...

Did you have to evacuate? Stay at home? Or life as usual even with the black smoke billowing?

Yeah, hopefully insurance kicks in for the ones I know. No evacuations for me, I'm down in the Bay Area, so pretty distant from ground zero. Smoke was really bad though. Would have been kinda beautiful if not for the health impact and knowledge of all the suffering surrounding it.

Gotta try to be prepared to lose everything any day I guess... Stoicism is a philosophy with a lot to say on the matter.

Hey, hope everything is going ok! Your opening makes me worried but you had lots of good stuff to show in the rest of your news. I need to take a closer look through your reading list. Right now I'm reading "Why We Dream", which just came out in November. I'm trying to be up on the latest Dream stuff in case anything could play well in Nightmare Cops.

Why We Dream makes reference to another book called The Third Reich of Dreams, which is supposed to be fascinating. It's based on the records of a psychoanalyst who logged their patients evolving dreams during the rise of the Third Reich. Turns out it's a rare book but I decided to order a used copy anyway to leave no stone unturned.

Third Reich of Dreams came up in Why We Dream on the topic of people believing in "shared dreams" in an astral sort of sense when the reality is more likely that overarching themes in society are impacting peoples' dreams in similar ways. Nightmare Cops has a big ongoing theme of anxiety over automation and I feel like it all plays well with that.

I'm curious to see more of your thoughts on Angular and what all you are doing with it. Some day I'll find my new happy place away from AS2 and it would be nice if I could use it to do cool NG front-end stuff.

Yeah, my opening was maybe a bit dramatic! I need to focus more on the positive.

Why we dream looks good! I just added it to my audible collection to listen to during my commute.

In one of my previous posts (https://bomtoons.newgrounds.com/news/post/1018356) I mentioned a bunch of recent dreams (here's another from back in the day: https://bomtoons.newgrounds.com/news/post/589977). Every once in a while I'll have really wacky, off-the-wall, dreams, but I find that usually the symbols, and especially the EMOTIONS experienced during the dream, are revelatory about what's going on in my life and how I'm trying to process/work through recent events.

I heard a RadioLab (I think) recently about how the chemical and electrical activity that goes on during dreaming helps reset our brains and also how dreaming allows us to process trauma in a state where certain parts of our brains (that are normally re-traumatized by remembering trauma) are shut off. Essentially: dreaming can allow us to process trauma without being damaged by the experience of remembering it consciously.

That's really cool that you're jumping into dream research for inspiration in Nightmare Cops, makes me look forward to it even more!

Third Reich of Dreams sounds even more fascinating. I'll see if I can find a copy of that one for myself too. (Update: I ordered a used copy from Amazon!)

I think you'd enjoy Godel, Escher, Bach quite a bit - it's kind of eclectic in its content, but touches on various ways that art, music, logic, math, computer science, and REALITY overlap and intersect.

The other book by the same author uses a short French poem as its premise. Then the author takes that poem and has over 100 people translate it then analyzes the translations and delves into questions about what language is and whether translation can ever be done perfectly (or communication for that matter), ultimately touching on ideas of consciousness and, again, the nature of reality.

As usual, thanks for popping your head in here and leaving a comment. You're what underpins the "specialness" of the NG community. Is the Tumblr stuff going to turn out as huge for NG as it's appearing to so far?

Probably good to be close to the water too huh. Good to know.

Yeah, life's a fickle thing, homes, possessions... cloud backups are the only thing you can really rely on these days. ;)

Also for some reason I'm suddenly a bit intrigued by what reading material might've lingered above hmm... need to get into some of this stuff too, the more philosophical and furthering of reading material... it's been exclusively Detective Conan for a few months straight at this point...

The water presence is really nice! Temperatures are crazily consistent!

I'd recommend any of those books I mentioned in my post.

@WonderSchwfity @BoMToons i guess so. most moved to derpi and furfintty which i have too.

Ok, these are terms with which I am unfamiliar...

@TomFulp @BoMToons Godel, Escher, Bach sounds cool, will have to take a look.

This Tumblr stuff is definitely different from anything that has happened in a very long time. I have a lot of fear of people deciding NG doesn't have enough of what they want but I'm hoping they like the ongoing updates and stick around for the long-haul! I don't know how long this uptick will continue but the longer it goes the more promising the future looks.

@BoMToons two large site for the Brony and furry fandom